We packed our things and left to spend the day in Boston. At the train station I noticed a high density of angry-looking blonde women, more than I have ever seen in one area before. I was composing a poem about Boston in my head using this information until we boarded the train and I saw a couple neutral-faced Asian men. Boston is diverse.
|Check out THIS diversity.|
In Boston we took the Freedom Trail, which is a red line of paint and bricks that leads tourists around to all of the historical landmarks. We saw a couple guys dressed in colonial attire which was exciting until we saw redcoats and wanted to kill them. Quincy was our tour guide, and we walked to where the Boston Massacre occurred and to the "Commons" and such. My favorite stops were the graveyards, where the graves look exactly like Halloween lawn decorations. We spent a lot of time here looking at names and dates ("This one died 1750! WHAAAT? Oh shit, she was 17"). We threw pennies on Paul Revere's headstone, which is apparently a thing. My penny bounced off the grave and landed on someone else's, but I wanted to look cool so I just pretended I didn't notice.
|A "Death's Head", rather cute.|
After chilling in the sun for a while, we went back to the North End (I had to look this up. I don't really know the lingo) to see an improv show. I double-fisted some pizza and some passerby made fun of me ("Is that Ricardo's? Mmmm smells like c***") which made me feel self conscious so I tried throwing away the pizza, but it was one of those garbage cans you have to open with a handle, but I had two pizzas in my hand so I opened it with my elbows and threw away the crusts. There were two guys watching me do this and I left quickly hoping to never to see them again, but they turned out to be the hosts of the comedy show. Grand.
The comedy show was excellent. Five dollars brought us two hours of improv.
"Audience, we need suggestions. What is a job that your grandfather might've had?"
"Slave driver." I say.
"Slave driver." I say a little louder.
"No. Someone else."
This pretty much sums up the evening.
We left Boston at around 11 and went to Sonic back near Quincy. It's a fast food place and apparently the servers are supposed to come out on roller skates, but our server, "$$Lisbeth$$", was too lazy. She walked out our food and later we saw her when her shift ended and she left WITH HER ROLLER SKATES. She does not deserve the dollar signs in her name.